I Still Don’t Understand Super Markets

I have been here for almost 30 years now, waiting and watching all you people from the my past live their boring little lives. Everyone is just so damned worried about the little things.

For example, why are you all so worried about the food you eat. It’s embarrassing how much time you spend prepping and eating food all day long. It’s worse than being stuck drifting in space for 90 days, and that is pretty bad!

Let me tell you a story. Sometime in 2175, the number of people requiring food overruns the ability to produce it the natural way. So scientists came up with two solutions. One was the replicator unit that used proton energy displacement to replicate food items from computer memory. The other was what I grew up on – Glunk.

Glunk was a synthesized food product that manufacturers made in a clean environment. They designed it to be a perfect food. It came in two flavors. Red and Black – each one more satisfying than the other. A single GlunkPack would replace a single meal – and there was no prep required.

See – now isn’t that easier!

No more, what are we having tonight? Well I don’t like broccoli, and I don’t like bread. Things we’re just easier. You ate your Glunk – and that was it.

Now how does that make you feel about how much time you waste shopping for food?

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